As part of Sands 40th anniversary this year, we will share 40 stories by 40 parents, family members and friends affected by the death of a baby. Starting in June to coincide with Sands Awareness Month and our #FindingTheWords campaign, we aim to show the sheer number of people who are affected by the tragedy of a baby’s death, help other bereaved parents to understand they are not alone and raise awareness of the issues surrounding stillbirth and neonatal death. Visit our 40 stories for #Sands40 to view other blogs in the series.

Here is my story of the loss of my son.

This year should be a big milestone for my third born George. He would have become a teenager!

But sadly that was never to be.

I was 23 weeks pregnant. I had a three year old daughter and 18 month old son.  

I had a bad feeling something was wrong. The movements had stopped. I was so scared.

I went to the hospital with my then husband and two children when I was told that my baby had no heartbeat and he had passed away.

I was devastated. My world had crumbled in an instant.  

I was induced the following day and that evening at 21.24 and gave birth to my beautiful little boy George. Born silently and fast asleep.

He was perfect in every way.

I held him close for ages.

My beautiful baby boy. 

Precious in every way.

I will never forget that summer's evening on Monday 11th July 2005 when I had my angel.  

Five years later I gave birth to my rainbow baby Henry George. 

Forever in my heart.

Forever loved.

Photo: Emma Bazeley's son, George.