We are so sorry that you find yourself here, but we are very glad you’ve found us.
Sands is here to support you for as long as you need. Whether you’re a dad, brother, uncle, grandparent, friend or colleague there is information and support available in many different ways, some of which are listed below.
Sands Support Books
Few experiences can compare to the trauma and pain of pregnancy loss of the death of a baby. Sands is available to provide support for as long as you need it and to be there for you through this difficult time.
One way is through the Sands Bereavement Support Book which has multiple chapters containing practical information and material to help you understand the emotional effects of bereavement.
We also offer our Bereavement Support Book translations in Arabic, Bengali, Polish, Portuguese, Punjabi, Urdu, Ukrainian, Simplified Chinese and Welsh languages.
You can order a copy of the book from our shop.
Online Support for Men
The Sands Facebook Support Group for men is a community of bereaved men, including dads, grandparents, brothers, and, uncles all helping each other through pregnancy and baby loss. You can register and join using the link: https://www.facebook.com/groups/sandssupportfordads
The Sands Online Community provides a safe space for anyone to connect and share with each other 24 hours a day.
In addition, we offer support meetings online. Some of these are open to anyone affected by pregnancy loss or baby loss, and others are intended as safe spaces for specific groups. If you would like to attend, please book onto one:
- Online support meeting for Men only
- Online support meeting for anyone affected
- Online support meeting for anyone affected from Black Communities
- Online support meeting for anyone affected from South Asian Communities
"When a baby dies, fathers and partners are often expected to be the ‘strong’ one and take on a supportive role. Their own grief can be overlooked, so it’s vital that their emotional needs are recognised and understood. The stress on couples when a baby dies can be huge. It is very difficult to give support and understanding to someone else when you are so sad and in need of support yourself.
"Grief is very individual and you and your partner may not feel or need the same things at the same time. You may also have different ways of expressing and dealing with your feelings. It’s important not to make assumptions about gender stereotypes, but some men do find that they need different ways to seek support."
Jen Cotes, Director of Bereavement Support Services at Sands
Sands United Football Clubs
Sands United FC is a unique way for dads and other bereaved family members to come together through a shared love of sport and find a support network where they can feel at ease talking about their grief when they're ready. Learn more about Sands United.
Talking to children about baby loss
You may find that you are the one who has to break the news to wider family and friends as well as any siblings at home. We have information about talking to children of different ages within our Bereavement Support book and also within in our Support for Siblings section that can help.
Long-ago Bereaved
You may not have been bereaved recently, but our support is there for anyone who has experienced pregnancy loss or the death of a baby, no matter how long ago. We are often contacted by people whose baby died as many as thirty or forty years ago as well as those whose baby died more recently but who are still grieving. Find out more.