My name is Tanya and on the 29th August 2021, my husband, Gary, and I devastatingly suffered the loss of our first child Ruby, at 35 weeks. Ruby was born sleeping at East Surrey Hospital following a low-risk pregnancy. Looking back, we were so oblivious. We were so excited about having a baby and everything was going so well – we had no idea this could happen to us.
Gary’s good friend Pete was one of the first people he phoned to tell him the upsetting news from hospital that day, Ruby’s heart beat had stopped. From that moment on Pete wanted to help us and do something in memory of our daughter.
Pete had always trained in the gym and entered strongman competitions. Shortly after Ruby’s funeral he put the idea to us that he wanted to organise A Big Pull event to raise money for Sands. He knew we had stayed in the “Sands” room at East Surrey Hospital. We were both incredibly touched by this. Keeping Ruby’s name alive was something so important to us and at that point in our lives we were very much caught up in a tornado of grief and pain. To hear her name spoken of and to even have an event named after her gave us comfort.
The months past and Pete struggled to find a venue that was large enough to cater for three lorries ranging from 13 – 53 tonnes but eventually he found a car park large enough in Ruby’s home town. Gary is a grab lorry driver himself and decided he wanted to take part. He had never competed in any strongman competition before but a few weeks before, he took the opportunity to train with Pete.
It all came together on Sunday 18th September, 35 strongmen and women including Gary entered 3 individual rounds of different weighted trucks. We even had a “Pull a Skip” stall for any non-competitors wanting a go at pulling a skip lorry and having a taste of what it feels like to be a 'strongman'
Gary was totally in awe of the other competitors and wanted to enter to see how far he could go. He went through many emotions and supported by his friends and other competitors he surprised us all and pulled the 53 tonne lorry. Our family were so proud of him, and he felt Ruby had been with him all the way to give him the strength to succeed.
The day was a huge success and a great fun family day out. The event was sponsored by local companies and raffle prizes were donated by local businesses.
Ultimately the point of the event was to do something positive to remember baby Ruby and also to raise awareness about the work Sands does and stillbirth in general. It was an emotional day for us, yet it was also full of joy. Every penny raised has gone to goes to Sands who will put this to good use helping families in need and carrying out further research into stillbirth and neonatal death.
The total amount raised was £10,080.60. Pete has certainly set the bar very high for any future events he plans to run and has given Ruby a legacy and a special memory which we will carry for the rest of our lives.